Book Review: Simply Tuesday by Emily P. Freeman

While browsing Instagram I frequently came across the book Simply Tuesday by Emily P. Freeman. It looked good to me. It looked like a book I needed to read. The sub caption under the title is "Small-moment living in a fast-moving world." Yes, I needed that. My world has been spinning so fast the last number of months with moving, working, buying a house, remodeling a house, taking care of my husband and three children, that I definitely needed a reminder to slow down. I started reading the book and I felt I was sitting across the table having coffee with Emily, and she was simply just sharing her heart with me. I love reading books that make me feel like that. But, it was also like she was reading my mail my heart.

Small moment living isn't a bad thing. It's good.

It's stopping to notice the little things in life.

It's remembering what's important.

It's acknowledging that I don't have to promote myself or make myself or my life something big, grand or to even be recognized.

It's about making the selfish part of me small, and the God inside of me BIG.

It's determining to be at peace with not being known by people, but knowing that the God of the universe sees and knows me.

Being small is being humble. It's intentionally putting God and others before me and my agenda.

And, it's about not rushing things. Let things be small. Let myself be small like a child. I have a lot to learn from children.

This book was such perfect timing for me and I hope that everyone gives themselves the opportunity to read it.


Some quotes from the book...

"Small is the position of my soul, the posture by which I approach others, God, and myself. When I'm small, I know I can't control opinions, manipulate outcomes, or force my agenda on others. When I'm small, I can move into the world confident as the person I most deeply am because I know I don't move into the world alone. If this is true, then small is my new free."

"Tuesday is the week's producer. What happens here, if done right, if done well, leaves no fingerprints-dinner around the table, laundry folded in the baskets, the meeting with the boss over coffee, five hundred more words toward the deadline. The big stuff of life we save for the weekend. Tuesday holds the ordinary, the everyday, and the small."

"What gives moments meaning is not the moments themselves but the presence of Christ with us in the midst of them. To learn to live well in ordinary time is to keep company with Christ on our simple Tuesdays and remember how he delights in keeping company with us."

"Jesus doesn't say, Come to me, keep company with me, and you'll learn to do nothing, to be passive, to never work again. He says, Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly. Being with Jesus brings a different kind of living and a different kind of working-the kind that starts with being."


Personally, what I take away after reading this book...

I don't want to promote myself in any way-in my thoughts, actions, social media, my conversations, my relationships with others, or in my heart.

I want to be "small" or humble...known by people. I want to be open, vulnerable and transparent with others.

I want to resolve to be happy with whatever place I am at in life. To be content and at peace, knowing God is in control and His timing is perfect.

I want to be free from all selfish ambition and know that my most important goals to accomplish are those that God has created and called me to. I can wait on God and let Him lead me.

I will continue to rest in the truth that God sees me, loves me, and has a great future for me. I can trust Him.

Book Review: Make It Happen

Last year I came across Lara Casey's website, blog and book... Make It Happen. Her book jumped out at me because the theme of the book is to live a life on purpose. I began last year really establishing that I want to live a life on purpose rather than a life of perfection. I began to think and pray about what it really means to live a life on purpose. Along came the book Make It Happen.  

This book is ideal for any woman that seeks to dig deep into her heart and see what holds her back from her God given purpose and how to achieve it. Lara is extremely vulnerable and transparent as she shares her own personal journey of living her own life on purpose for God's glory.

Some quotes from the book:

"The enemy of taking action is the false belief in 'someday.' Do the good you know you ought to do-and start now. Do it knowing that you might not have as much time as you think. The alternative is to do nothing, and that does, well, nothing. Don't wait to live."

"Fear can hold us back from making what matters happen. Fear can create a false reality where we feel threatened even if nothing has actually happened yet. What do you feel could be threatened in your life?"

"If you want change, choose it."

"We are so quick to limit ourselves, deciding who we are and who we aren't and that's it. We define our identities-our strengths, weaknesses, likes, dislikes, and beliefs-but this rigid defining can hinder us from seeing the potential that God sees. We stay in our little identity boxes, not allowing ourselves to be stretched or challenged. We accept the world's made-up rules for who we are supposed to be, and we believe we cannot break those rules."

"When it comes to our faith, we must choose trust over feelings. There are many times we cannot feel God working, but we can trust that He is. We may not feel loved by God, but we can trust that His love never changes."

"You are going to fail sometimes, and things won't always go the way you hoped. But here's the beautiful paradox about failure: failure will get you further than fear."

"The good you do today changes generations. Life is too short and too valuable to coast through, living by accident. Take your time writing down your goals, pray on them, talk them out with people you trust, and then commit."


Getting Personal:

I was deeply moved by this book. It was very challenging as I answered in my journal the many heart provoking questions that Lara asked throughout the book. I knew that if I am really going to see change and purpose in my life it begins with being honest with God and myself about who I am and where I'm at in life at the moment.

I think it helped me to write out these answers because it opened my eyes to what really holds me back from stepping out into what God has for me...like fear of rejection. It helped me to see what living a life on purpose really means for me personally and not letting my fear of rejection hold me back from it. I want to be open and transparent with people and not let the fear of rejection keep me from meaningful relationships.

For example, I shared with someone how much they mean to me and what a blessing they have been in my life. She responded, "I had no idea." My heart was grieved for the rest of the day. It made me so sad to think that someone so special to me didn't know it. I was reminded that people can't read my mind. I must speak out. I must live life intentionally and in all my relationships.

At the end of the book there are strategies for living a life on purpose that I found so helpful and practical. Some of them are to have a short list of 3-5 things I will accomplish a day, clearing out the clutter in my mind (distractions), and taking social media breaks. I finished the book thinking that I can live a more focused, purposeful, meaningful life. It's worth the read. You can make it happen in your life, too, with the help and grace of God!

Book Review: Women of the Word

I really enjoyed Women of the Word by Jen Wilkin. I read it in one day. It was powerful, challenging and encouraging. As Jen says in the beginning of the book, the goal of this book is "equipping women through Bible study."

Quotes from the book:

"We should study asking not just what a particular portion of Scripture wants to tell us, but how that portion of Scripture is telling us the Big Story of the Bible as a whole. Studying the Bible with purpose means keeping its overarching message in view at all times."

"The temptation to make the Bible applicable to our current experience without preserving its ties to its original audience is strong."

"Without prayer, our study is nothing but an intellectual pursuit. With prayer, it is a means of communing with the Lord."

Jen Wilkins does an excellent job addressing the variety of ways that we approach reading/studying God's Word, and showing how they may be faulty. I appreciate her simple, and yet thorough approach to Bible Study. Jen is very clear about the five steps we should take when studying the Bible: purpose, perspective, patience, process, and prayer.

My Personal Thoughts:
It spoke to me the most that I should read the Bible to learn about who God is first, rather than trying to find something out about myself and who I am. She sums it up in this quote:

"Any study of the Bible that seeks to establish our identity without first proclaiming God's identity will render partial and limited help. We must turn around our habit of asking "Who am I?" We must first ask, "What does this passage teach me about God?" before we ask it to teach us anything about ourselves. We must acknowledge that the Bible is a book about God."

I felt really convicted when I read this. The strong pull of this world is to be narcissistic- to have everything revolve around self. I can see now that there is a temptation to allow our Bible study to become so self-focused, as well.

I now have a new perspective as I look forward to digging into God's Word and learning more about who He is!

Some Really Good Marriage Advice

This is an excellent book and I've read it more than once! My mother-in-law gave it to me early on in our marriage and I'm so thankful that she did! I have learned so much about being a godly, feminine, woman and wife. It has shaped my life and role as a wife. I love the countless, encouraging testimonies throughout the book, as well.

The author shares countless pieces of wisdom that I've found helpful. But, three chapters which profoundly impacted my marriage and relationship with my husband:

1.)  Accept him!

           Find the good in him, accept him as he is "today" and even if he never changes. Accept his right to be himself and accept his needs. Accept his faults (personal habits, use of time and money, social behavior, etc). Don't compare him to other men you see that would be great examples for him to follow.

2.)  Appreciate him!

This has to do with gratitude, respect and his ego. Show him appreciation daily. Appreciate his character, intelligence and what he does for you. Especially communicate appreciation for him when he's out of his comfort zone-doing something to bless me.

3.)  Admire him!

Respect his judgement, his abilities & his communication. Respect him in public and respect him in my assumptions of him

When I first read this book many years ago, I realized that I was having a hard time accepting some things about my husband. These were things that I wanted him to change and thought I had the power to change in him. These were the things that made me mad, frustrated, angry and resentful. These were the things that were my expectations of him.
So, I got out a piece of paper and wrote down each one of these things. Then, I prayed. I verbally spoke out loud that I accepted my husband for each thing as I went down the list. I relinquished control over my husband to God. I resolved that I would accept him for who he is. Then, I tore up the piece of paper, never to be seen again.  There was no need to hang on to that list anymore. God changed my heart. I can honestly say, today,  I don't even remember everything I wrote on that list so many years ago. But, I do continue desire to be a wife that would accept her husband. I'm so thankful God helped me to see where I needed to change. God is so good.


I encourage every woman to read this book!

Book Review: 1000 Gifts

I read One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp and it has changed my life. It is a book about one woman's journey to being thankful to God for the little, everyday things in life. 

I feel that God has been trying to get a hold of my heart in the area of praising Him for quite some time. It seems that I struggle with thanking God not only in the good times, but in the difficult times as well. Ann's book took me out of myself and my natural tendencies of worry and stress and shifted my focus to thanking God. Her writing in the book is beautiful and poetic; I wish my thoughts would translate into words that beautiful and profound! Many times I came across various thoughts so deep and thought provoking that caused me to stop and think for the rest of the day about them.

For example:

"We only enter into the full life if our faith gives thanks."

"Thanksgiving is inherent to a true salvation experience; thanksgiving is necessary to live the well, whole, fullest life."

"…this dare to write down one thousand things I love. It really is a dare to name all the ways that God loves me."

"God gives us time. And who has time for God?"

"Hurry always empties a soul."

"Without God's Word as a lens, the world warps."

"The dark can give birth to life; suffering can deliver grace."

"Do I really smother my own joy because I believe that anger achieves more than love?"

Getting Personal:

The biggest challenge Ann's book brought to my life was to stop intending to be thankful and praise God for little and big things and start doing it. So, I did. I bought a cheap composition notebook from Target and began my list of 1000 gifts. 

Honestly, it felt a little strange at first. I felt like I was LOOKING for things to be thankful for (I felt guilty shouldn't they just be flowing from my brain onto paper??). Then they started to come to me-the view from my window, my kids in their pj's , my quiet time to journal and write my thoughts, etc.

The book has inspired me to want to look for things I can be thankful for throughout my day. I now think, "OK, I need to write some things down that I'm thankful for in my journal. I need to keep it up." When I start writing, so many thoughts begin to fill my journal. As I write them down I find myself becoming more thankful. My heart softens and changes. I begin to see with new eyes. And the truth sets me free. I HAVE BEEN BLESSED IN SO MANY WAYS. There are countless little ways that I feel loved by God or others. Every little thing that I write down that I'm thankful for comes from God; HE loves me! For it says in James 1:17, "Every good and perfect gift comes from above." All these little things I am thankful for came from God. Joy fills my heart, and I see now the goodness and blessing in my life, rather than the emptiness or areas that I haven't seen God do something that I want Him to. It has built my faith-if God can bless me with so many little things in my day and life, can't He still do it again and do abundantly more and in ways I don't expect?

Please read it for yourself and start writing your list of 1000 gifts today. It has definitely been a gift in my life. God has used it to change my life, my heart, my attitude, my joy, my faith, my love for God and others.

Book Review: The Circle Maker

I was given The Circle Maker by Mark Batterson as a Christmas present from my husband. He knew it was a book that I would want to read because his dad read it…and I always want to read what he is reading. He loves to read too, and I like to keep up with his book recommendations  This particular book is about prayer-how important it is, how powerful it is, and how necessary it is for believers to go to God with our prayer requests...HE HEARS US!

Some excellent quotes in the book:

"Bold prayers honor God, and God honors bold prayers. God isn't offended by your biggest dreams or boldest prayers. He is offended by anything less. If your prayers aren't impossible to you, they are insulting to God. Why? because they don't require divine intervention."

"Who you become is determined by how you pray."

"The author, pastor of one of the largest churches in Seoul, Korea, wrote, 'God does not answer vague prayers.' When I read that statement,  I was immediately convicted by how vague my prayers were. Some of them were so vague that there was no way of knowing whether God had answered them or not."

"When you pray regularly, you never know when God will show up or speak up. Today could be the day. When you live in prayer mode, you live with holy anticipation. you know that coincidences are Providences."

"Praying hard is hard because you can't just pray like it depends on God; you also have to work like it depends on you. You can't just be willing to pray about it; you also have to be willing to do something about it. And this is where many of us get stuck spiritually. We're willing to pray right up to the point of discomfort, but no further. We're willing to pray right up to the point of inconvenience, but no further. Praying hard is uncomfortable and inconvenient, but that is when you know you're getting close to a miracle!"

My Thoughts:

After reading this I am not the same Christian. It has challenged me to pray specifically for things. I don't need to be general in what I ask of God, I must be specific. God answers specific prayers. I think I'm all too often afraid to ask God for specific things because I'm afraid He won't answer me or do them for me. I have thought, "Maybe I'm not worthy enough of that specific request."  Or maybe He'll think I'm stupid or ungrateful or asking too much. But that is simply not true. I have had a distorted perspective of God as my Father. He wants to bless my life. He wants and needs me to be open and honest with him. He wants me to have a vision for things and ask specifically for them. He wants to use me and move through me. I have had to grow in my faith and believe these things of God. It has challenged me to get a bigger perspective of who God is.  By the way, I've learned He's much bigger than I've made Him out to be. I have been stirred to seek God. I'm seeking His vision and purpose for my life at this time and specifically praying for those things to come to pass. 

The Circle Maker is filled with encouraging stories and testimonies of how God has answered prayer in Matt's life and those he knows. I needed to read this book. It has fanned the flame of prayer in my life in a powerful way. I pray it does the same for you!

Book Review: The Money Saving Mom's Budget

Book Review: The Money Saving Mom's Budget (Slash your spending, Pay down your debt, Streamline your life, and Save Thousands a year) by Crystal Paine

  

Overview:

Crystal's book is an excellent book on living within your financial means, creating and living on a budget. It contains helpful resources. I appreciate Crystal's approach-slow and easy! She emphasizes to not try and do a complete overhaul overnight. She has an extremely thorough chapter on coupons. If you ever wanted help in using coupons, this is the book for you. At the end of the book, she also has an appendix on "10 tips for a successful garage sale" and "10 ways to earn an extra $100 per month."  There is also a list of websites and specific book recommendations on various topics.

A Few Quotes:

"If you want to get your finances in order, you must learn to say no. Not only do you need to learn to say no to overspending and no to buying things you can't afford, but first and foremost you must learn to say no to over-booking your life. You'll never be able to take control of your bank account or make significant traction toward your financial goals if you spend the bulk of your time running around like a chicken with its head cut off."

"When your children have a birthday and get new toys, have them choose the same number of old toys to get rid of. Without much effort, this rule keeps clutter from prolific breeding in the closets behind your back."

"A budget gives purpose to your money and it frees you up to enjoy living life rather than spending most of your time worrying about how you're going to afford to live."

"On occasion, challenge yourself to see how long you can go without going to the grocery store. When we do this, I often find we have a lot more food on hand than I realized."

My Thoughts:

Crystal's book is so valuable. It helped me to see that money itself is not the only thing that needs to be budgeted. Time and priorities show first and foremost where your money goes. Every hear the saying "show me your checkbook, and I'll show you where your heart is?" It's true. So, unexpectedly, I really got the most out of Crystal's chapter on setting personal goals, knowing what I'm good at, what I want to see happen in my life in the next 5-10 years and the end of my life. I did this and it really opened my eyes. I saw what is REALLY important to me. What goes across the board in all the areas I wrote down is where I found my priorities and where I'll deposit my time and money. For example, rather than buying a new outfit, I learned that if I really love to write, I'd rather put money towards a writer's workshop, some sort of class, or babysitter so that I can write. I like to look nice, but what's my goal? Crystal's book really helped me to think about my goals long term and how my finances affect them.

I loved her chapter towards the end of the book on contentment. It is so important to make a gratitude list and remember what I've been given by God-the list is endless. If I can keep a grateful perspective, it will help me remember that eternal things are much more precious than earthly, material things. God is so good!

 *You can check out Crystal's blog here.

       

A Must Have Book for Pastor's Wives

This month my family and I traveled to California to go our annual Harvester's Homecoming at our mother church. It's a time when all the pastors and their families that have been sent out to pioneer a church return home for a time of preaching and refreshing. Recently, I've been reflecting on my role as a pastor's wife, and I'm so thankful for a book I came across that really encouraged me....I wish I would have found it sooner!

Jeana Floyd's, 10 Things Every Minister's Wife Needs to Know, is a well written book full of wisdom. Jeana wrote this book after serving in the ministry with her husband for 30 years. Being a pastor's wife is not an easy role to fill. But after reading the first chapter, I was immediately drawn to spend time with God. That one thing is the most important thing I can do as a pastor's wife. Reading Jeana Floyd's book brought a confidence in my life as I sought to fulfill my role as a pastor's wife.

A Few Quotes from the book:

* "Survival in ministry to me is knowing that I have a personal relationship with Christ, who knows every detail of my life, and gives me the awesome privilege of coming before Him - in the "secret place."

* "I heard it said one time that your husband's appearance is a reflection of you, and your countenance is a reflection of your marriage."

* "Taking the time to be a few minutes early and speak to people, or visiting with church members after service doesn't sound like anything particularly spiritual or clever. However, it shows that you care about your people, that you are interested in their lives, and that you actually like them!"

* "Being raised in a pastor's home, I was taught that you cannot have friends in the ministry. Because ministry life and the expectations that go along with it have changed so drastically, I personally believe it is possible to have relationships and friendships in ministry. In fact, I will go a step further and say that you must have friends and relationships in ministry."

* "If we are 'spent' from constantly pouring into the lives of others, we will not be effective in ministering to those God particularly wants us to reach. Remember, even Jesus drew aside from the crowds to refresh Himself." 

 Here are some things that I wrote down in my journal that spoke to me from the book:

• My presence at church and events tells people that I care about them and that this is important to me
• Let the men be men
• Love the people, let my husband be the pastor
• Your children will really know if you love the church by the things you say at home; they will know how you value each church member in what you say about them outside of church
• Share positives of dad being a pastor with my kids
• Count on criticism
• Always listen and learn from critics and allow it to draw me close to God
• Let the Lord fight my battles
• Deal with hurt inwardly (with God), not outwardly
• All relationships must have boundaries...relationships also make ministry fun
• Don't let the disappointment of a very few keep you from enjoying the love of many others
• When I love others, they will love me back
• Mentor--be what God has called me to be in front of other women 

My Application: After reading this book, my perspective changed in how I look at my role as a pastor's wife. I realized how significant my attendance at church services and church functions simply was. I've always gone to all the church services ever since I've been a Christian. But, long ago I was a girl who arrived right on time to church and left the second the closing prayer was made. Even when I got married I wanted to leave right after service. But, I've changed. I take joy in looking for those I can talk to and connect with at church. I linger after service...sometimes my husband (the pastor) heads out the door before I do! People are important and my heart is to do my best to convey it.


 

God Said Yes

June 19, 2011 is a day our church will always remember. Five young men were driving home from our annual Bible Conference, a tire blew, the car rolled seven times, landed on the opposite side of the freeway, two young men died, one was paralyzed from the neck down, and two were rushed to the hospital for severe injuries.

We prayed, believing God for mighty miracles in the three boys' lives that were facing physical pain and injuries. People around the world began to pray. God moved and all three have experienced healing in various ways.

In this time of great turmoil, a dear friend of mine told me about the book God Said Yes by Heather Horn-Bland and Ninie Hammon. It's the testimony of a little girl that overcame the odds and experienced 13 medical miracles in her body. It immediately brought me hope in the midst of a difficult situation. It strengthened my faith that nothing is impossible for God.

What It Says On the Front Cover:

“When four-year-old Heather was run over by a car, doctors told the family she wouldn’t survive. Now 34 years, 187 operations, and 13 medical miracles, Heather is alive to tell her story.”

Overview:

Heather and Ninie beautifully recount the amazing story of Heather’s life. Heather overcame different obstacles in her life: emotionally, physically, and spiritually. She jumped into the front seat of the car at the age of four, the door opened and she fell out. The front tire was on her stomach. It's not known how she got out from under that tire. But, God knows and saved her. God said, "Yes"--Heather would live. Even after Heather's accident, Heather endured abuse from a neighbor down the street that brought deep emotional pain. In addition, the man she married left her during a very hard time in their lives. Yet, despite all of the pain and trials, Heather pressed forward, trusting God.
 

A Few Quotes:

Heather, age 4, still in the hospital after the accident… “I stood there proudly, beaming, as the doctors and nurses-including the orthopedist who had pronounced solemnly that I would be in a wheelchair for the rest of my life-burst into applause. But I wasn’t finished. With a grin that threatened to split open my whole face, I lifted one foot and carefully took a shaky step forward. And then another. And another. I didn’t even limp-astonishing given that there was still an inch-wide gap between the broken halves of my pelvic bone.”

“As Mom sat in the chair beside my bed, staring with unseeing eyes out the window at the street below, I just knew the tired old phrase was echoing in her head:  This many bad things can’t possibly happen to one person! How many times over the years had we heard somebody say that about me? Every time yet another ghastly thing occurred, we could count on fielding that comment from someone.”

 Towards the end of her story Heather says,

“Despite decades of suffering, pain was not the driving force of my life. It never had been. I had been propelled through life by the engine of joy. Over the years, I made thousands and thousands of individual decisions not to be controlled by pain. If I had been unwilling to suck it up and go on, if I had allowed self-pity and bitterness to snag fishhooks into my soul, I would have missed everything. Everything that mattered.”

 “I thought back over the events of the last year, the hardest year of my life, and I was filled with an overwhelming gratitude. The bleaker my life got, the brighter God’s incredible gifts of joy sparkled in the darkness.”

"the joy of the Lord is your strength" Nehemiah 8:10

My Thoughts:

This was such an inspirational story to read. It helped and encouraged me in my walk with God, to hear how another Christian endured trials and suffering with joy. 

It reaffirmed my faith that:

• God is real...God saved Heather's life-against all odds she survived the accident
• He will send His angels to watch over me...an angel was with Heather in her hospital room after the accident
• God's grace is sufficient for me..Heather continuously made the decision to trust God and choose joy in the midst of her pain throughout her life
• God works miracles in people's lives, and He can for me, too...Heather technically died two times, but lived
• God is my healer...God healed Heather's body to the degree that she conceived two children
• God provides my needs whatever they may be...God used people to buy Heather's incredibly expensive medicine, when she had no means to buy it herself

Heather's story ignited my faith once again for these things personally, and for others that I know enduring difficult situations. It gave me hope as I read through the book, for the young men in our church that were in the accident.

I've struggled in my life with a lot of unnecessary fear, especially while being pregnant. I've worried about my upcoming cesarean surgeries and what would happen to me and/or my baby. I struggled with the fear of the unknown...wondering if I'd survive the surgeries or the fear that the doctors might make a mistake. But, reading Heather's story gave me a peace and comfort that God is in control. With God, I have nothing to fear. I can trust God to watch over me and those I love. Heather went through 187 operations and God took care of her. No, everything wasn't perfect, but God carried her through every step of the way. 

"For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind."

2 Timothy 1:7

I highly recommend this book for anyone to read. It touched my heart and opened my eyes to see my loving Savior in a new light. God is good. 

More Roadside Church Signs

    Need to laugh a little?

Need to be inspired?

Need to be stirred in your thinking?

      I don't know about you, but I love to read the signs outside of church buildings. They are usually such clever, witty, and wise words about God, Christianity, and life. These church signs are not that big, so the sayings have to be short and powerful. I have to admit that in my life there have been a few times I have been going through a struggle and I'm surprised as I've driven by a church and read their sign. It spoke right to my heart about the issue at hand. God will use what He needs to in order to speak to me!

     So, as I was shopping one day I found this little book, More Roadside Church Signs Across America by Mary Compton and David Compton and had to buy it. It's a perfect little coffee table book or bedtime reading. It's filled with short honest truths. Here are some I wanted to share with you:

"Morality, like art, consists in drawing a line somewhere."

"GRACE: God's Riches At Christ's Expense."

"Practice makes perfect, so be careful what you practice."

"Life is like tennis: Serve well and you seldom lose."

"A hypocrite is a person who's not himself on Sunday."

"Why don't you stop trying to figure God out and start 

trying to figure Him in?"

"Christianity is a pilgrimage, not a sightseeing tour."

"You can give without loving but you cannot love without giving."

"Be the soul provider for your children."

"ASAP-Always Say A Prayer."

"The best vitamin for a Christian is B1."

I love these little sayings.

Leave a comment-I'd love to hear which one has spoken to your heart today?"

Renewed In Ministry

     I have to tell you something I remember I said when I was a little girl. I can still picture where I was at the exact moment I said it. I was eight years old in a tree I had climbed across the street from my house (one of my favorite things to do at the time). I was facing my house and talking to God. I told God, “I never want to marry a pastor or minister because I don’t want to have to go to church all the time.” 

     Can you believe I said that! I feel embarrassed and kind of laugh at myself now…I’ve been married to a man that has been in the ministry for ALL fifteen years of our marriage this July! And you know what, I love it! And, I do go to church all the time and am really thankful I do so. I love supporting my husband in what God has called him to do. Our lives and marriage have been blessed. God has spoken to me countless times during church services throughout all these years. God has done so much in and through my life because of church. 

     With that being said, there have been many joys and challenges with being married to a man in the ministry. I have tried to glean wisdom from books on the topic and pastor's wives that I personally know. One book that particularly blessed me was Renewal on the Run (Embracing the Privileges and Expectations of a Ministry Wife) by Jill Briscoe. Jill's wise and simple words brought a lot of encouragement and insight into ministry life. It helped me accept that my life and marriage in the ministry are unique, as well as my position as a pastor’s wife.

 Have you thought?

How do I keep going in ministry when I feel drained?

How do I support my husband? I feel like he's into it more than I am.

How do I handle people in the church criticizing my husband?

Do I have any real friends to hang out with and who I can be myself with?

Do people in the church expect me to act a certain way or do certain things?

 Then, this book would be good for you!

Best For:  Women married to a pastor or minister; HOWEVER, I do believe this book would be great for every Christian woman whether your husband is in some form of ministry or not. We are all ministering for the Gospel as Christian believers, and the key points that Jill shares are relevant to us all.

Overview:  Jill has been in the ministry for over forty years now and has compiled a book of advice and wisdom on her role as a pastor’s wife. She shares touching personal stories of the struggles and blessings of ministry life. Also, Jill encourages the pastor’s wife to be who God has created her to be with the unique gifts He’s blessed her with. "Be yourself," Jill would say. She also encourages the wife in ministry to put God first as her ultimate priority and to spend time with God for renewal. I love her lists at the end of the book on “Nine Practical Ways of Dealing with Criticism” and “Practical Ideas for Battling Busyness”.

A Few Quotes:

“According to one fact-finding group, too many pastors’ wives had no trusted friend, and many have no person they could go to for support or indeed have any support group at all. But guess how many of those women asked for help when they really needed it? One percent. Only one percent shouted, ‘Help!’ even though they were hanging on by their fingernails.”

“Therefore God must be at the center of our partnership. We must bank on His involvement. He is ‘for’ us. Then we need to operate under the assumption that we, too, are as committed to ministry as our husbands are. If not, we are going to have a miserable time in full-time service. It is from this source of commitment-His and ours-that we get the excitement and joy that accompany fruitful ministry.”

 “You see, you may be a ministry wife, but God never forgets that you and your family need ministering to as well. We think that we spend our lives serving others, but the Lord has a twofold plan. He wants us to learn how to serve others and become more like Him. And then He turns around our serving and our situations to heal us, to care for us, and to grow us up, often through the very people we have helped.”

“Looking back over fourteen years of missionary work and thirty five years as a pastor’s wife, I find that the things that knocked me off my feet more than anything else have been (and continue to be) the criticisms of other Christians. Living with disapproval can drain you of all your good resolves to put the King first.”

“Encouragement cannot harm people-a loving word from you will always help somehow, if even a little, if only for a moment. As ministry wives, our skills and callings are varied, but we can be unceasing encouragers.”

My Thoughts:

     I read Jill’s book a few months after I was struggling with what my purpose was in God. I was wrestling with a spirit of defeat, frustration and unrealistic expectations of myself and others-especially of being perfect. But, I realized I don’t have to be a perfect pastor’s wife. "So," I was asking God, "What do You want me to do?"

Some main points in Renewal on the Run that spoke to me and brought clarity to my role were:

 

1.       I need to live and use the gifts that God has given me whether I’m married to a pastor or not. God still created me for a purpose.

2.       I need to understand where my friendships lie in the diagram (below) Jill so accurately showed in her book. I love how she explains Jesus' friendships within this diagram. Jill stated that "Jesus Himself had friends: twelve good friends, three very good friends, and one best friend...[and] the seventy-Jesus' close acquaintances...Beyond that was the space representing the multitudes." Jill explained that Jesus had people that fit into each of these circles in His life. It helped me so much on my perspective on friendship. I asked myself, "Who are the people that fit into these circles in my life?" Also, I was encouraged that I can’t be dependent on my husband for my one and only friendship. That’s not realistic nor fair to him, too. I need people in my life that will nurture my walk with God, as well as friends that I can encourage.

3.       My perception of the 9-5 hour work day for my husband is unrealistic. I am called to obey God at all times and that may mean letting my husband go to a meeting during the week or counsel a marriage in the evening when I would want him home. God spoke to Jill that she can’t have hours like a post office-she and her family must be available at all times. Reading that freed me to expect to be available at any time, not just when it’s convenient for me and my family. After reading this book, what I thought were negatives, I now see as positives.

4.       My time with the Lord is KEY! I need times of refreshing-setting aside time to be in God’s presence, to hear His voice, and to listen to what He has to say. Jill says at the end of the book, “but remember that your resource for encouragement, courage, and strength is in the care and provision of God.” Everything I need can be found in JESUS!

    I am so thankful for the privilege of being married to a pastor. We have been so blessed to serve God’s church. I’m thankful for the encouragement along the journey. God is so good!

Book Review: The Bait of Satan

Free from Offenses

 In the beginning of this year, I read the book, The Bait of Satan (Living Free From the Deadly Trap of Offense) by John Bevere. It's one of the most powerful books I've read.

Best For:  People that may be experiencing a wall in their relationship with God and not sure why; people that want to know how to deal with people and past situations that have offended them; people that want to develop healthy, loving relationships; people that want to grow in their walk with God

Overview:  John Bevere shares how offenses are the breeding ground for the enemy. They entrap us. John powerfully reveals the truth of God in regards to offenses. He exposes how we fall in to this trap and also offers hope in how to avoid it. His last chapter focuses on the objective of reconciliation. We must deal with our offenses in order to move forward in our relationship with God and to have healthy, strong relationships with others. The book conveys John’s personal stories, those of others, and how God helped them release their offenses to God. As a result, great things happened in their lives. Every chapter has a testimony of how God used this book to help someone deal with a heart of unforgiveness. There is a thirty day devotional at the back of the book as well as a thirty minute DVD sermon by the author.

Some of John Bevere’s points in the book are:

• ·         What is an offense?
• ·         The consequences of holding onto offenses
•       How an offense leads to betrayal
• ·         Dealing with offenses that come from our father and father figures
• ·         The power of being rooted in the Word of God
•           Reconciliation is our goal
• ·         How trials in life serve to expose our hearts and either lead to our           growth or bitterness

Few Quotes:

“The truth remains: Only those you care about can hurt you.  You expect more from them-after all, you’ve given more of yourself to them. The higher the expectations, the greater the fall.”

“A believer who chooses to delight in the Word of God in the midst of adversity will avoid being offended. That person will be like a tree whose roots search deep to where the Spirit provides strength and nourishment. He will draw from the well of God deep within his spirit. This will mature him to the point where adversity will now be the catalyst for fruit.”

 “One way the enemy keeps a person in an offended state is to keep the offense hidden, cloaked with pride.”

“I often say that trials and tests locate a person. In other words, they determine where you are spiritually. They reveal the true condition of your heart. How you react under pressure is how the real you reacts.”

 “It is unrighteous for us as children of God to avenge ourselves. But that is exactly what we are seeking when we refuse to forgive. We desire, seek, plan, and carry out revenge. We will not forgive until the debt is paid in full, and only we can determine the acceptable compensation. When we seek to correct the wrong done to us, we set ourselves up as judges.”

My Application: I was reading this book and feeling pretty good about myself. No one was coming to mind that I was offended at. I was feeling pretty happy. Yes, I can get through this without having to deal with my heart. HA! That’s what I thought! When I read, I usually write down quotes and thoughts that stand out to me in a journal. After the page where I had taken some notes, I flipped it over in my journal, and I had written about the breakthrough that God gave me in an anger issue! The whole time I was reading the book, God was trying to soften the soil of my heart in order to expose the deeper issue. I thank God He did.

My breakthrough? 

 Well, one day I was seething in anger over things that people close to me were not doing that they should be doing, or things that people were doing that they should not be doing. I was angry at myself for feeling anger towards people and circumstances, as well as feeling powerless to change myself. I could not take it!  So many things were bothering me. It built up, and I began to write down everything that I was angry about. My list came to 17 things in a matter of minutes! I wanted to be free from this bondage of anger and felt so powerless to get a breakthrough in it. I didn’t want to live with all these things tormenting me. I wanted to be a free, joyful person again. 

Photo source: istockphoto.com

I prayed that God would help me. I called my pastor, who is also my father-in-law, and talked to him about this. I didn’t read him my list; I didn’t need to. He said something that rocked my world. 

He said, “Usually we are angry at people because we do those very same things ourselves!”

I knew that God wanted me to go down my list and repent of being angry at each issue I had written down on paper. But, after repenting for being angry with each one, I prayed that God would forgive me for having that same issue in my heart. For example, I prayed that God would forgive me for being angry for people not wanting God in their life. And then I repented for not wanting God in my life. Yes, there are times in my life where I feel tempted to want my own way and not God’s way. 

This set me free from being angry with people and situations I was in. It did something powerful as well. God was able to give me compassion for each person and situation. It helped me to see that I am not perfect. I am a sinner. I need Jesus. I am messed up too. I need God’s forgiveness, grace and mercy.

In the book, John talks about being the “judge” over people when we are angry. I learned that I am not a good judge, and God does a much better job at it. I had to release people to God so that He could move in their life. It gave me compassion for these people.  I agree with John Bevere when he said, “A person who cannot forgive has forgotten the great debt for which they were forgiven. When you realize that Jesus delivered you from eternal death and torment, you will release others unconditionally.”

My Thoughts: John Bevere’s book is the best one I have ever read on the topic of anger and offenses.  Hearing all the personal stories and testimonies brought so much hope to me. If God could help that person, surely He can help me if I allow Him to. John’s message could be summed up when he said, “…forgive as God does, without limits.” In conclusion, he summarized 3 steps to healing: 

1) Recognize I’m hurt/offended.

2) Pray for the person that offended you.

3) Pray things for them you want God to do for YOU. 

I pray you will get a copy of this book and read it. I believe this is one of THE MOST important books you could ever read. It will change your thinking. It will change your life. It changed mine.